Two Practices to Keep You Grounded in 2019!

In education, it feels like we have the benefit of having two new years every year- the start of a new school year, and the start of a new calendar year. We are so fortunate!

In preparation for 2019, I have been doing a lot of celebrating, reflecting and goal-setting! I am excited and inspired to continue my work as an educational leader in 2019.  There are two practices that have helped me stay grounded in my work and I am sharing them below in an effort to support YOU as you prepare for 2019!

Practice 1: Start with WHY-  Acquaint or reacquaint yourself with Simon Sinek's work on WHY. Here is a recent blog post about his work for your reference. This year I have tried to encourage educators to find their professional WHY and also to support students in identifying their WHY, too.  The graphic below was created to keep this thinking at the forefront of our minds and is now being added to professional development slides, communications to staff, guiding questions for lesson planning and more.

How have you/will you use WHY in your work with students and teachers? Click here to share!

Practice 2: Identify your #oneword2019-   Four years ago I learned about the one-word initiative Jon Gordon wrote about in his book, "One Word that will Change Your Life" that encourages people to identify one word that will be their driving force for the year (instead of a list of resolutions that are often hard to accomplish/attain).

Interested in a little history?

Link to #believe (my one word for 2016)

Link to #wonder (my one word for 2017)

My one word for 2018 is trust (for just a few more days). I chose this word because I believe that trust is the foundation for all positive relationships, both with others and with myself. I have kept this word in mind every day as a reminder to trust myself, my dreams and my heart. I have kept this word in my mind every day in my work with staff, students and families, with the goal that I am a trusted leader, educator, colleague and someone in whom people can place their confidence. I have looked for examples of trust in different settings and situations in all areas of my life. I have let trust be my focus in 2018.

The video below is a brief 4-minute overview from Jon Gordon that provides the background for "One Word that will Change Your Life."

Over the next few days, I encourage all of you to take some time over the next few days to determine your one word for 2019.

In addition, I suggest looking at this #oneword365 website to connect with people around the globe and to get a list of suggested words!

Lastly, as you pick your one word for 2019, please take a risk and share it on this flipgrid and post your word on Twitter with the hashtag #oneword2019!

Wishing all of my educator colleagues a Happy and Healthy 2019!  

Look for the Helpers

Sometimes it is hard to slow ourselves down to reflect on the good things that are happening in our lives as educators, but it is so important. We're heading into Thanksgiving week.  Our school year is in full swing. We owe it to ourselves to take time to pause and think about the positives!   

One HUGE positive for me this year has been all of the helpers I have been able to find and connect with on Twitter to support the implementation of math workshop in our schools. Check out these helpers! All I had to do was look for them (and ask for help!).

Click here to access the links in the image above! 

Click here to access the links in the image above!

Click here to access the links in the image above!

Click here to access the links in the image above!

Mark Ellis, Cathery Yeh, Jay Billy, Dr. Nicky Newton, and Chris Dodge are 5 helpers who went the extra mile to support the growth and development of others just because they are GOOD people who care.  I am beyond thankful! 

Who are your helpers? Respond below!

Growth Mindset- an essential element in every learning community!

I have spent the last few hours reflecting on a meeting I had with literacy coaches in our district yesterday.  We were sharing the qualities we want our students, our colleagues and ourselves to have along with the learning stances to cultivate growth.

We debriefed our discussions and realized that the root of our work is directly aligned with a growth mindset.  The group raised some very important questions including:
Have we cultivated a culture in our schools where students and educators feel trusted and supported?  Have we taught all members of our school community about the brain science behind growth mindset and explicit ways to put it into practice?

As a "step 1", I have gathered some resources and created a brief Growth Mindset Overview that could be used with educators and families to begin the discussion and sharing!

Growth Mindset Overview for Educators and Families

I welcome your feedback and participation.  Please comment below and share!

We All Have a Story to Tell

I went for a haircut today. I have been going to the same hairdresser for more than 13 years.  His name is Khao. I love spending time with him because he is one of the hardest working people I know and because he always has a story to tell.  Oftentimes his stories are connected to his childhood in Thailand, where he grew up with very little, but today I asked him to tell me about why he became a hairdresser.

Khao came to America from Thailand when he was twenty-five.  He didn't know any English and his first job was working in the kitchen of a Thai restaurant washing dishes and eventually working his way up to cooking food, too.  He was thankful to be in America and to be making some money, but he wanted to have a career.  Khao started taking English classes at the library and once he had some keywords and phrases down, he enrolled in hairdressing school.  While going to school, he continued to work at the restaurant and also found a part-time job sweeping and maintaining a hair salon (the salon that he is still at today). It took him a year to graduate and the rest is history.

Khao's story is really sticking with me today.  In education, we know how important it is to build relationships and actively listen.  Today I experienced this in the hair salon with Khao.  I'm so glad I asked to hear his story and I'm so thankful that he shared it with me.  His determination, perseverance, and work ethic are traits to be admired and treasured.

This experience with Khao also reminds me of the video "Racing for 100 Dollar Bill" (included below).  Everyone has a story to tell and everyone has different obstacles to face and overcome along the way.

I left the salon with a lot more than a haircut today.

The Rabbit Listened (a gift from my mom)

My mom and I

My mother always finds a way to touch my heart.  She knows just what to say and do and she always supports me (both personally and professionally).  Yesterday she gave me the book, "The Rabbit Listened" by Cori Doerrfeld, as an early birthday gift.   

This story is about a little boy named Taylor who is going through a hard time. All of his friends try to suggest things he can do to feel better, but he doesn't want to talk to them. Finally, a rabbit comes and sits down next to Taylor. Taylor talks about his feelings and the rabbit just listens. Having a friend to listen is exactly what Taylor needed and by the end of his time with rabbit, Taylor felt happy and ready to try again.

Everyone needs a rabbit in their life who will listen to them.  My mother is my rabbit. She has helped me through so many challenges, just by listening.  She empowers me to think things through and supports me to come up with solutions independently.  I am so thankful for my mom.

Today I decided to make a read aloud video of "The Rabbit Listened" to share the message of this story with others.

Who is your rabbit?  Please comment below!

Being Open to Change

I have spent the last hour searching Google for quotes and images that will help me put into words the emotions I am juggling today.  I have been presented with an amazing opportunity to do something I have always dreamed of doing, but I have to leave behind a group of educators who are some of the most talented and committed educators I know.

I joined Stall Brook School as their principal last year. We spent the year creating an authentic, supportive culture in our school that was honest, supportive and encouraged the growth of everyone in our building.  Near the end of the year, we drafted the 2018-2019 school goals, redesigned our co-teaching teams, created a professional development plan, determined the next steps with student interventions, and so much more. Several teachers moved classrooms over the summer and they were excited about the new year in their new roles and spaces.

And then I saw an irresistible position posted on School Spring in another district- Assistant Director of Elementary Education.  I have always wanted to be a district leader, supporting and developing building principals and teachers in this capacity, a role aligned with my passions and strengths.  At first, I wasn't going to apply, but then I couldn't get the position out of my head. Over the course of a week, I applied, was called for an interview, interviewed, was offered the position, accepted the position and resigned from my current principal-ship.  So very exciting and so very overwhelming all at the same time.

I am in a transition period- still at my old school completing schedules, creating a guide for the new principal and other summer tasks. It has been so hard to look at the staff- custodians, teachers, and others with tears in their eyes.  They are mad, sad, disappointed, and scared. I went into school over the weekend (when no one was there) to clean out almost everything from my office to avoid any uncomfortable interactions.  I know everything is going to work out for the best for them, but I just feel terribly guilty right now.

As for my new district- everyone has been fantastic so far!  I had my ID taken, filled out all of the HR paperwork, and even moved in some essentials into my new office.  I won't officially start until the end of the month (and a BIG part of me wishes I could just start tomorrow!).

So here are the quotes I found today during my Google search.  I'm sharing them with the hope that they will inspire others who have had to make tough decisions, too.

We don't always have control over the WHEN!

Oh, this is so important!  Our dreams need to be BIG and we need to follow them!

Martin Luther King, Jr. is an inspiration and his words help me realize that it's ok that I took this step!  

This quote helps me remember what I am teaching my own children by taking risks and following my dreams.

Start With WHY

I hope with all of my heart that I inspire others. 

Being an educator is truly a gift in my life.  I love getting to know people (of all ages) and supporting them through the process of learning new things and recognizing their own talents and abilities. 

In my role as an elementary school principal, I have found myself feeling overwhelmed by the list of new initiatives students and educators are being asked to coordinate and participate in.  I have immersed myself in Simon Sinek's work this summer in an effort to find additional ways to continue the growth of a positive and authentic culture in my school and to help our educators identify their passions, prioritize their work, and reflect on what is most important.  I want educators to be able to use their WHY to stay passionate in their work, inspire their students and contribute to the learning of their colleagues.  (There is an endless amount of research that shows the impact of a positive school culture and student achievement, like this.)

One of the things that validate starting with WHY is that it is rooted in brain science!

Taken from a presentation I'm creating for PD with administrators linked here.

There are a lot of educators who have used Sinek's work to inspire them. I came across a blog post from Three Teachers Talk entitled, "Starting With WHY" , that explains the importance of educators communicating their WHY to students.  Look at how powerful it is:

-Three Teachers Talk (2016)

  I was so impressed and moved by the Three Teachers Talk blog post that I wrote the following comment.

As you can see, I wrote this response on July 2nd and I have not been able to get it out of my mind since then.  I am so concerned that talented educators are going to leave education because of the added demands and I am committed to building a trusting school culture where students, staff, and families feel safe to take risks in order to learn and grow.  Regardless of my role in education, I will always stay connected to my roots as a teacher.

I decided to reach out to educators on Twitter to see what their WHY was!

Click here for link to this tweet.

The amazing Tracy Cramer responded with a Ted Talk she made explaining how she found her WHY in 54 words!

Other educators shared their WHY on this padlet: Start With WHY Educator Share

So, here are my next steps!  I am finalizing two professional development experiences- one for the district administrators in August and the other for staff on opening day.  BUT WE NEED TO DO MORE THAN PD.  I need your help.  We need to find a way to use WHY to guide our work more directly in education, to keep passion in education and to prioritize our initiatives.  Please share your suggestions, experiences, and comments below!

End of Year Stress

I always feel like this is the time of year that we run 100% on adrenaline- there are so many things to do and we're balancing several things at once. The last month of school is filled with so many to-dos, and sometimes we let the tasks overwhelm us and change the way we react and support the students who need us most.  I sent the following message out to staff this morning with hopes of supporting them and our students through this end of year transition.

I am going to make an assumption (based on some observations) that our students are beginning to sense the end of the year is near. We may see students exhibit behaviors that we haven't seen for a while OR new behaviors that leave us wondering. I found an article (linked here) that reminds of WHY this happens and how to support students through this transitional time. 

"These students may begin acting out, appear less focused, and possibly shut down. Also, to adults, youthful fear and anxiety may look like anger."

In addition, the article reminds us of what stress does to the body.

"Under significant stress, the brain becomes hyper-vigilant, hyper-focused, reactive, and emotional. When stress hijacks the emotional limbic brain, we are left in a survival response as the prefrontal cortex shuts down and turns off. The frontal lobe allows us to think through choices and consequences, plan, prioritize, problem solve, and emotionally regulate with focused attention. When a continuous stream of fear, anxiety, and worries seizes our frontal lobes, our ability to think through experiences and challenges is compromised."

I want you to know that I recognize how frustrating behavior management can be at this time of year, but I also want to remind you how important it is to dig deep inside yourself to monitor your response, stay calm (at least on the outside), and ask for support from colleagues or myself if you need it.

I hope this is helpful to all of you. I support you and know how hard you are working. We've got this!

As a follow-up to this message, I am going to begin this week's staff meeting by having them write a letter to their most challenging student.  They will not have to share this letter with anyone, but I'm hoping this process will give educators some quiet time to connect with this student. How do you help staff and students with the end of year stress?

How far one can go...

I wrote this blog post in March 2018.  It was the first time I ever shared my 2001 marathon story publicly and I wanted to provide insight into WHY I am who I am.  I am resharing today because this is the first "Marathon Monday" that I've been in Boston since 2001.  The idea of "How far one can go" has taken on a new meaning during this pandemic. So many people are willing to "risk going too far" and realizing "how far one can go".   I hope this serves as some inspiration for those who need it and gives some the push to put write about their experiences, too.  (April 20, 2020)


I became a distance runner after college. Running made me feel good- mind, body and soul. I proudly trained for, ran and completed my first marathon in Boston in 1999. This experience taught me so much about my strength and endurance and how far one can go.

I enthusiastically decided to run Boston again on April 16, 2001, but it was a last-minute decision, so I didn’t have a number. A friend knew a friend who had registered, but not running, so I was able to get her number, and I ran under the name “Melissa Hamburger”.

Most things felt the same about my second marathon- I was inspired by the runners around me, the streets were lined with fans holding signs and shouting words of encouragement, and I ran the course with a smile on my face, taking it all in. I monitored my pace with my running watch to be sure I wasn’t going too fast. I also stopped at every hydration station, alternating water, and Gatorade each time. Everything was going great!

It wasn’t until I crossed the finish line, after just over 4 hours of running, that I started to feel different. I had the chills and my body was shaking, so I got a mylar wrap and headed to the medical tent. I rested for a bit, and my family met me there to take me home.

I felt weak, but I got up from the medical tent with my mom, aunt, and boyfriend by my side and headed home. Leg one out of Boston was on a train, and as soon as the train starts moving, I got sick. It was so embarrassing, but my mom was there to take care of me.

I really don’t remember much about the train or the car ride back to my apartment. I do remember asking for water (lots and lots of glasses) in my apartment and my mom talking to the doctor, and my boyfriend leaving for the store to buy broth for me. That’s it. That’s all I remember.

My next memory was seeing my brother and sister-in-law holding a framed picture of my baby nephew so I could see it- I was laying down looking up at them and everything was blurry. I didn’t know where I was. I remember smiles on their faces and nurses coming to see me. I was in a hospital bed and I had been for 4 days.

When I learned about the scare that I put my family and friends through over the previous four days I was overwhelmed with sadness. On Marathon Monday, when I stopped remembering, I had passed out in my apartment. I was taken by ambulance to the local hospital where they pumped me with fluids. I started to seize, and they tried to reach my primary care, Dr. Richter. They called the wrong Dr. Richter (they found two) and although he didn’t know me, he agreed to meet me at the hospital he was affiliated with, Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston. I was transported by ambulance to MGH...how far one can go.

Dr. Richter and his team saved my life. They determined that I was suffering from hyponatremia (I was the sixth documented case in the United States at the time). I had too much water in my body which caused my sodium and potassium levels to drop. I was put in a medically induced coma so they could treat me and so my body could rest and heal. While I was healing, my family was alternating shifts by my bedside, waiting and hoping that I would wake up. What a horrible thing to go through.

As I mentioned before, I woke up after 4 days. I was then discharged from the hospital the next day. It took me several months to get back to 100% and my biggest healing points were not physically, but mentally. I had lost control of my body and that was hard to comprehend.

So, why am I sharing this story? This happened 17 years ago. So many wonderful things have happened in my life since then...I got married, have two beautiful kids, I moved to the same street as my brother and his family, my mom is a few minutes down the road, I am an elementary school principal, and I still go out on the road for a jog a few times a week. Life is good and I work hard to find the positives in every day, but when I start to see runners doing their long runs in preparation for the marathon in January or February, and the banners decorate the light posts along the route, I am reminded of what happened to me.

I still do not want to be in Massachusetts on Marathon Monday. I still get worried when someone I know says they’re going to run a marathon. Since 2002, my husband has planned surprise getaways for April vacation so I’m not in the state for the marathon. This vacation tradition has turned a really hard day and week into a happy memory maker.

I know we all have life events that test us and teach us how far one can go. I want you to know about this one because I think it explains a lot about me. Dr. Richter saved my life at Massachusetts General Hospital on Monday, April 16, 2001. I wake up every day committed to giving back to others. I take meaningful risks to grow and learn. I try to appreciate and celebrate the people in my life. I like to give people gifts and cook for them. I also have a tendency to work too much. I have been told by colleagues that I am the glue that keeps things going. I follow-through to a fault. I think I am always trying to push myself to see how far I one can go.

"Lil-Pump"- an email to my staff!

Below is an email I just sent out to my staff.  I'm trying to be transparent, sharing pieces of myself and my family in an effort to be "real" and grow together.

Dear Team,

I woke up thinking I wanted to share "Lil-Pump" with all of you.

My son Max is in 4th grade and last night was his open house and concert.  My husband (Michael), daughter (Lucy- 12 almost 13) and I got to see all the great things Max is learning...which is always so eye-opening and exciting.

Taking a step back from the night I realized that my son has really found his identity.  His work reflects what he is passionate about and all of his unique interests.  "Lil-Pump" exemplifies who he is as a 10-year-old.  He loves rap music, is fascinated with technology and how things work, and loves to find ways to simplify the world and responsibilities.

I'm sharing because I know we all have these moments in life- both at school and at home.  Take the time to celebrate the people in your life...and appreciate all they bring to this world.  

Thank YOU for all that you do!

How are you sharing your life with your staff?  Please comment below!